Dear Jon:

Okay, a girl's gotta make a living, right? And what sucks is, that I wasn't even really working that night! I was at this bar, pretty much minding my own business and I was talked up to by this hot guy. I didn't do nothing different but talk to the guy and he said what would it take to get with me. I figured I wasn't really working and the guy was really fine so I said a buck and half. Next thing I knew I was arrested and taken to the jail for prostituting. He didn't say he was a cop and we didn't do nothing. Can't I beat this?

--Anthony

Dear Anthony:

Come on guy, "a buck and half?" You're cheaper than a transfer on the Clark Street bus!

And congratulations---You have just beat the all-time record holder among the thousands of discount prostitutes I represented during my old Public Defender days. The former record holder agreed to oral sex with an under-cover cop for a can of Old-Style.

Actually, the Officer does not have to announce his Office, even when asked by the prostitute. That is just one of those TV-show myths. And there need not be a consummation of the agreement. In Illinois, a person commits the crime of Prostitution at the moment there is an agreement to perform any act of sexual penetration, touching or fondling of the sex organs, in exchange for anything of value. Although in your case, you might have an issue regarding value!

And it is not a defense to claim that the Officer propositioned you. The statute makes it clear that any person who performs, offers or agrees to perform, is guilty of prostitution.

It has been my experience that most prostitutes consider getting arrested as just a part of the job, an occupational hazard. And getting arrested can get expensive. Given that fact, you might want to reconsider your rates!

**This column is not legal advice, but is solely for the entertainment of the reader**

Jon Erickson is a partner in the law firm of Erickson & Oppenheimer. If you have a question for Jon, you can reach him at 773-875-4646