Aries March, 21-April, 19
Clap for the wolfman! The catch is not getting the clap from a man that looks like a wolf. We know how those hairy men turn you on, so pick through those pelts and check for bugs!

Taurus April, 20 - May, 21
It's that time again where you can put on women's panties, make up and wedgie heels and no one will even turn their head. It takes more than a kemo wig and blue eye shadow to make you a woman.

Gemini May, 21 - June, 21
Shall we go to one of the many parties we have been invited to, or throw one of our own? That is your quandary. I say go to someone else's party, maybe two if you have the gumption. It beats cleaning up your own mess.

Cancer June, 22 - July, 22
While I am on the subject of parties, don't you think that you should get out of the house and do something? This is our high holy days, get with it Cancer!

Leo July, 23 - August, 22
Mighty Leo, just because you give candy to the little boys and girls doesn't mean you can make them do what you want, unless it is candy apples or homemade popcorn with nuts.

Virgo August, 23 - September, 22
It is time to decide what fabulous costume it will be this year. The bitterness of not winning all the costume contests still clings to your craw like dried poop. There might be an idea there!

Libra September, 23 - October, 22
Stop the press! There is great news on your horizon. I can't tell you exactly what it is because of the new HIPPA laws, but you'll find out soon enough.

Scorpio October, 23 - November, 21
You have encountered the nicest guy in the whole world as far as you are concerned. Don't jump into anything heels over head as you usually do, give it time to play out. You'll be glad you did.

Sagittarius November, 22 - December, 21
Since you are scared easily, before you head out on Halloween night, get in a pair of adult diapers. That will save time at the bathroom and with the right accessories, you have a costume!

Capricorn December, 22 - January, 19
There are many choices for you to face but the hardest one will be your costume. Remember that little nudity incident last year? Let that be your guiding light.

Aquarius January, 20 - February, 18
What does a slut wear on Halloween? The same thing they wear everyday!

Pisces February, 19 - March, 20
Facing uncertain times, you may want to spend Halloween looking for Mr. Right, or you can gather parts from many people and put together your very own Mr. Right. Hmmm, hasn't that been done?

Until Next timeTrick or Trick, Ms Mae