Well my kittens it's all up to you my furry friends to keep me on my toes and off my back paws! So, send me a letter either e-mail to Dear.Daisy@sbcglobal.net or you can always send it to me with a postal worker to BOI Magazine c/o Dear Daisy 3647 N. Halsted Ave., Chicago IL 60613. Now let's see what's on your mind!

Dear Daisy,
What are the scientific terms for boogers, and ear wax?
Just wanted to know.

Dear Enquiring Mind,
Those are the scientific terms. Its called mucus (MEW-cuss) before it's picked from your nose. Once free from your body it officially becomes a booger.\

Dear Daisy,
I would like to know how does my brain work?
Thanks,
Ahmed

Dear Ahmed,
The human brain contains a group of miniature trolls. These trolls are responsible for every function from the human body from emotions and memories to operating our limbs when we wish to move. What most people don't know is these trolls have minds and wills of their own and we must treat them with respect otherwise they'll start talking in my head again and I'll be forced to try to remove them with an awl. Respect your trolls, Ahmed. They're you're best friends. But they can be your worst enemies.

Dear Daisy,
Hi, I'm going to go to college this fall and have a few questions:

1) What things should I bring to college?

2) Are there any good sites offering this info?

Thanks

Dear Thanks,
Here's a list of things no college student should be without (aside from the obvious):
· screwdrivers, both kinds
· a kitchen knife
· condoms
· paper plates and plastic utensils
· some kind of glasses/mugs/cups
· a beer bong
· a bong bong
· television and VCR
· condoms
· stereo
· bedding and pillows
· your parent's calling card
· condoms
· handcuffs
· a length of cotton rope (it doesn't leave rope burn)
· hammer
· spare flat sheet/American or foreign flag (to be used as a curtain)
· condoms
· one "get out of jail free" card from your parent's Monopoly set
· microwave oven
· extension cord(s)
· broom
· vacuum cleaner
Oh, and don't forget the condoms.

Happy learnin'!

Dear Daisy,
My husband recently confided in me that he sometimes thinks about other men when we make love. I appreciate his honesty, but now every time we have sex I wonder who he is really thinking about. How can I overcome this and enjoy sex once again?

Signed
why me?

Dear Why me?,
That's a strange coincidence because whenever I'm having sex I think of you .

I eat granola for breakfast every day. Every day. Without fail. When it becomes monotonous I throw a little fruit on top and it's a whole new dish. I doubt my granola gets too jealous because I still eat it, enjoy it and benefit from it's goodness. We've got a good, solid relationship. But without the little extra fun added in I don't think I could eat it as much as I do.

Dear Daisy,
I am really down in the dumps! No one loves me anymore! And I think I am going crazy! People just love to get on my nerves! Help me!

Stephanie

Dear Stephanie,
I always find it funny how that set designers for all those science fiction shows and movies create spaceships which have tops and bottoms and sides. In space, once you get away from a planet, there's no such thing as up or down. All that exists is this way or that way and even those directions can change without computerized navigation aids. You see, once there are no reference points for humans to compare their position to, all direction falls by the wayside. You've pushed to far away from your home planet. Do what you can to drift closer to what you know so you can get your bearings once again.

And if you don't feel like you can even cope with this simple navigational task you should report to sick bay. They've got medication to help you restore your navigational systems.

Dear Daisy,
What is 1% of 3000 ?

Signed
Sum Dum Gui

Dear Sum Dum Gui,
It is truly a sign of the end times when I find myself answering mathematics problems. Do you know what 1% of 300 is? Don't you suppose that if you added another zero to that answer you might have yours?