Aries March, 21-April, 19
As you weave your spells to lure unsuspecting tricks into your web if deceit, remember, you were once a novice. Do unto others, then let them do you.

Taurus April, 20 - May, 21
Find a happy medium and start fresh. That means douche and then go out! People will be less likely to talk about after you walk by them.

Gemini May, 21 - June, 21
Your future is at a crossroads now. You seem to be at a fork in the road. Well at least it's not in your mouth. You are starting to look like Paula Sinclare! That is no future.

Cancer June, 22 - July, 22
You are diabolical and underhanded. We love you for that, but the thing that most people can't understand about you is why pastels?

Leo July, 23 - August, 22
You are indeed in your element. This is your birth phase and the planets are opening up to you. So are most of the legs that you encounter, so be safe and rule the pride.

Virgo August, 23 - September, 22
You have been attempting life as if it were a bag of booby prizes, one fuck up after another. But fear not dear Virgo, things are looking up. You may get a Booby.

Libra September, 23 - October, 22
Poor Libra, you are always looking for balance; where can you find it? Dinner and a movie, not when it is a street vendor and a peep show! Keep looking

Scorpio October, 23 - November, 21
Your sharp tongue doesn't fool all of us. On the outside you are brash and hard but on the inside you are a squishy soft pussy cat. Lighten up, you only have one life, have fun.

Sagittarius November, 22 - December, 21
You are constantly on the run these days. Take some time out for yourself. You need to unwind, if you don't you are going to explode and you know how messy that can be!

Capricorn December, 22 - January, 19
Simmer is your favorite season except for the heat and the lack of rain. I guess maybe it isn't. Well, fall is on it's way and you are fascinated by all the pretty colors.

Aquarius January, 20 - February, 18
You have been the brunt of the Astrological Forecast for many years, but guess what? You're still a slut.

Pisces February, 19 - March, 20
Hold on dearly to the one you love. It may seem that the road is rocky but instead of going out to a club, stay in and snuggle and eat that Rocky Road.

Until Next timeFaith is not Blind Ms Mae