Diary Of Desperation: Part 2
By Dennis Michaels
[Note: Part 1 can be found in Issue #01.09 and online at www.BoiMagazine.com]

Friday, 12/26/08
I have only one month left before my all-gay cruise leaves out of Miami and I still have 10 pounds yet to lose in order to reach my ideal cruising weight of 185. And now I have to find a new gym since my old stomping grounds just revoked my membership, citing "inappropriate sexual activity in the sauna." I've never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Tuesday, 12/30/08
Instead of joining another health club right away, I've decided to just work out at Steamworks for the next month. Their gym on the top floor is actually quite nice with plenty of cardio machines, equipment and free weights. After I finish working out I can use the showers, steam room, and sauna and most importantly I won't get in trouble for having sex. I weighed in at 183 today.

Thursday, 1/1/09
Happy New Year! I wasn't too wild and crazy last night and still managed to get laid: some twink-ish guy - Trevor - who was quite adept and acrobatic in bed. Good thing I was drained dry by Trevor because when I went to Steamworks to work out the place was packed with major hotties.

Wednesday, 1/7/09
I had a very interesting conversation with a co-worker - Sherry, a straight female - about my upcoming cruise. She's very leery about people purposefully segregating themselves by race, gender or sexual orientation. I tried to explain to her that I was in no way trying to get rid of her or any other straights from my life, but that I was just minimizing their number and influence for a week. She thinks this is a bad idea, especially in this Age of Obama. I told her one of my friends who is going on the cruise is _ Black & _ Asian. She was not amused and still thinks it's bad.

Thursday, 1/8/09
I'm a bit pissed. I've been steady going to the gym this past week and my body actually looks more toned and in shape, but my weight is at 182. I only lost 1 pound in the past week. Now I know how those poor saps on Biggest Loser feel when they've had a disappointing scale result.

Monday, 1/12/09
I had a date with Trevor this past weekend and the sex afterwards at his place was interesting. Add the words "adventuresome" and "kinky" to describe sex with Trevor. Not wanting to completely re-live it here in long-hand, all I'll say is that while I was performing oral sex, another tongue, belonging to Charlie, his chocolate Labrador retriever, took care of his balls, while I was working on the rod. Yes, Trevor and Charlie returned the favor. Yes, I enjoyed it. I guess I can officially be classified as a freak.

Thursday, 1/15/09
I miss carbs and pizza and Popeye's fried chicken, but I must being doing something right because I'm now down to 179. Thankfully, those Lean Cuisine frozen microwavable meals come in so many varieties and they've been on sale all month. 10 days until the cruise and 4 pounds to go.

Monday, 1/19/09
Sherry at work began again to harp at me about going on a gay cruise and how it was wrong. I finally broke it down to her in the most simplest of terms: for seven days I'll be living in a floating city with 3,700 other human beings, all of whom have penises potentially directed at me 24/7. I asked her how that could possibly be wrong? She thought for a moment, smiled slightly, and nodded her head as she FINALLY understood.

Thursday, 1/22/09
I am so EXCITED! I weighed in at 176 last night after my workout and then got some lickage from Trevor and Charlie. I fly to Miami in the morning and will get in two more workouts down there before the cruise leaves on Sunday, so I will assume that my goal weight of 175 will be reached. Yeah!!! I wonder if there will be any blind guys with seeing eye dogs on the cruise.