QE2 Unmasked
A RtVR Supplemental

It seems like only yesterday good friend and fellow columnist Susanna Homan, writer of Chicago Sun Time's Susanna's Night Out, and I were hob knobbing at the QE2 pre-mixer back in early December. Joined by Chef to the Stars Art Smith and Novelist Catherine Lanagin, we shared a light hearted evening exchanging ideas, making coffee dates, discussing whose designer True Religion jeans were the tightest and what the night's signature drink, pre-titled the QE-tini, should be.

After much drinking and slurred debate, we chose a lovely orange cream concoction created by Janice Tannenbaum that was amply intoxicating. Adding large amounts of alcohol masked with just enough sweet, it seemed appropriate.

It was that night when All Terrain Productions' party captains Brook Jay, Sarah Eck and Liam Bruno promised to produce a high caliber affair that could only be rendered that of L,G, B or T for the second year in a row.

Yet all the talking, eye brow plucking, and outfit choosing can't even come close to the awesome experience of this premier event. The party is what it's all about.

For any QE newbie, arriving on the third floor of the lavish Sofitel Hotel can be somewhat intimidating. The place is huge! Gays like it large. No worries though. The tall sexy blonde with the neckline to her navel and the gleaming white smile was there to assist. Maven Superstar Jessika Sterling herself greeted the attendees and happily directed them to any of the four premium open bars, the intense and dimly lit main ballroom, the smoking lounge, the food station vestibule or the cabaret room where star of stage and screen Honey West preformed till countdown.

 

The hosts for the evening were the devilish duo from Fox News, producer David Viggiano and morning meteorologist Michelle Leigh. And when Michelle tells you to dance -- while DJs Matt Wells and Chris Eterno kept the floor full with taut torsos and tailored tuxedos -- you better dance. If not, bare the consequence of being renal prodded by Michelle's three pronged Satan scepter. She had no self conscious issues admitting that David's was bigger, but she knew how to use it.

The last time I was in Crystal Lake, I had a full discussion regarding QE2 gear with star of indie flick Eating Out and American Idol finalist Jim Verraros. It was complete with design schematics, colors and e-mailed URLs and yet somehow we still both ended up wearing the exact same thing. He claimed he was so busy working on his debut CD due out in March, he simply forgot. Unacceptable! Someone was going to have to remove their derby and inner shirt.

I was hot anyway, and Jim's beautiful girlfriend Becky was so sweet, I got cavities.

Dessert wouldn't be served for another hour and, starting to get the munchies, I slithered my way into the dressing room to see what treats could be found. Go-Go Boys abounding, they asked if they should remove their shirts for photographs. Um? Yes please.

After the clock struck twelve, and the ballroom crowd thinned out after the hot midnight performance by Circuit Mom, I looked about me wondering where my kiss was. There was a twenty foot circumference surrounding me and I swear crickets could be heard.
Luckily, Honey West took pity and planted one on me to satisfy my New Year's need.

Hand a homo a mike and a martini and suddenly it's all about Madonna, Cher and, if you're a columnist who thinks he's eclectic cool, Pat Benetar. Kara-fucking-oke.! 'Nuff said. That's when you know it's time go.

Wanna see more? Check out the photo galleries on Chicagopride.com

Compliments, cocktails, concerns and engraved invitations are always welcome; contact Jason Paul at JPsVelvetRopes@aol.com.